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Friday, Nov. 29, 2024
The Emory Wheel

Tired of Hearing About the Stock Market? Turn to Astrology Instead

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(Emory Wheel / Alison Barlow)

“The stock market is astrology for men.” 

In recent years, Sherrod DeGrippo’s tweet, and others comparing astrology to the stock market have gone viral, claiming they have the same degree of accuracy. While the comparison may seem silly, with the stock market dominating the global economy and astrology dominating Tik Tok, the two strangely have several commonalities. Both exist as potential tools to increase personal wealth and lead a more fulfilling life. Despite these commonalities, astrology is a productive tool for improving life and igniting self-growth, whereas the stock market solely exists to elevate corporations and the top 1%. 

For centuries, astrology has been an integral part of life and religion in many places. It has roots in Hinduism, yet some demean it as inaccurate, whimsical and silly. The stock market, on the other hand, is an elitist institution that has only been around for two hundred years and dominates a large portion of the narrative around the modern economy. The two exist at opposite ends; yet one can actually help you, while the other exists to rob you. 

Who doesn’t want insight into their future? Astrology offers personal enlightenment into one’s true character. Your birth chart is a window into your highest self, devoid of the influences or burdens placed on you by others. Astrologers studying your birth chart can show substantive paths to your future self and reveal important pathways towards your friendships, career and romantic partnerships. They can also utilize birth charts as a place for clients to engage in introspection, so they can investigate important aspects of their lives like their financial or emotional states. Even celebrities employ astrologists, like Princess Diana (whose moon sign I share) regularly consulted astrologer Penny Thornton about her marriage to Prince Charles and royal life. Even Ronald Reagan consulted an astrologer about important White House decisions.

Uncovering your birth chart can provide numerous benefits. Astrology helps people become the best versions of themselves through careful listening and dedication to the stars. Some people even base major life decisions, like quitting their job or getting married, on the signs because they believe in the omnipotence of the universe. This isn’t to say astrology is an accurate science or practice; rather, it has the ability to open people up to self-reflection and new pathways to understanding themselves. At least if you base your decisions on the stars, you don’t have to blame yourself when things don’t work out. 

When you go into a basic astrological website, such as Cafe Astrology, you simply input the day, time and place of birth and you can learn your birth chart. Often, these websites will break down your birth chart and offer insight. As a Gemini rising, my chart says, “Very quick-witted, somewhat nervous and restless personality.” When I first read this analysis, I reflected on what resonates and what doesn’t. Through examining all of your signs in different planets, you can reflect on what is meaningful and important to you; for me, I think about how I interact with my friends or how I leverage my strengths. Astrology allows you to look yourself in the mirror and confront your personality, for better or worse, even if you don’t take the leap to believe in it. 

The stock market and Wall Street, on the other hand, don’t offer the same potential for self-introspection and growth to the everyday person. The stock market is controlled by the exorbitantly wealthy, with the top 1% of households owning over 50% of all stocks and the next 10% only acquiring 35.4%. The stock market is a vehicle for which the wealthy can play with the economy while blue-collar workers are affected by minute changes that they are not privy to command at their will. The stock market is not driven by data, but rather the emotions, whims and investments of the balding and feeble wealthy while workers suffer from the fluctuations and lack of security. 

Even when everyday consumers try to participate in the market, they are blocked by brokerage companies, who impose restrictions. For instance, after the GameStop disaster, TD Ameritrade, a brokerage company, and other trading companies restricted the trading of several stocks such as AMC and GameStop, who were involved in the trading frenzy. These restrictions limited users’ ability to take control of the stock market as they did earlier in February. 

Furthermore, when the stock market crashes, millions of people are affected. Investing in it is a risky game, and failure in the market can lead to catastrophic worldwide economic disasters, such as the 1929 stock market crash or the 2008 recession. The stars will always be there for you during global crises, but the stock market could care less. 

Investing in astrology is free and can guide you to improve your life without risking your life savings. Invest in yourself and your future, not the tools of capitalism. 

Rachel Broun (23C) is from Carrboro, North Carolina.