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As the Super Bowl approaches
Us Patriots fans admire great coaches
With a tradition of being the best
We are glad to finally have a test
As we look back on the season
Many teams did horrible but not without good reason
Let’s remember the year
And give each team a cheer

The poor Buffalo Bills never had a chance
At 9-7 they’re better off taking next year abroad in France

Miami may be known for beaches and tans
But they’re lucky to get even 300 fans
Sure they may win a game or two
But there is really no hope for them to ever get through

The last of the AFC East is certainly the least
They embarrass New York and constantly get fleeced
Geno Smith and Mike Vick sure are slick
15 combined interceptions really does the trick

When playing the Steel Curtain
There is one thing that is certain
Mike Tomlin gets mad
And Big Ben always looks sad

The Bengals are the champions of the regular season
But when they get to the playoffs it’s like they were just teasin’
Epic collapses and terrible losses
Bengals fans are better off just watching “Horrible Bosses”

Terrell Suggs may not say our QBs name
But we beat them so that’s kinda lame

Josh Gordon’s a great player when he’s at his best
But he’ll probably never play because he failed another drug test
The poor city pinned their hopes on Johnny Football
I’m sorry Cleveland but LeBron can’t do it all

Thankfully the Broncos didn’t make it to the big game
Because after last year it would have been a shame

Kansas City may have big Jamaal
But they’ll never win because Alex Smith cannot throw the ball

Philip Rivers started the season off right
And it looked like the chargers might actually put up a fight
Their good play came to an end
And their super bowl hopes are about as real as Manti Te’o’s girlfriend

The Raiders have crazy fans and a big need
Too bad there draft strategy is centered around people with 4.3 speed

The Colts are sore losers and we’ve destroyed them twice
Watching Andrew Luck lose is really quite nice
Accusations that we cheated were suddenly created
While the Colts Super Bowl dreams were subsequently deflated

J.J. Watt is a beast
Thank god the Texans aren’t in the AFC East

Can the Jaguars even be considered an NFL team?
They are about as exciting as a cloud of steam

The Titans really aren’t that much better
They are about as dangerous as an English Setter

The NFC South will never win any awards
The entire division had losing records

The Packers are slackers
As for the Bears, no one cares
The Lions are about as cool as a bunch of Toyota Scions
And the Vikings spend the postseason going hiking

The NFC East is boring
Somehow Mark Sanchez is still relevant even though his play is deploring

Besides the Seahawks the NFC West doesn’t provide much of a test
Come this Sunday, we will all see why the Patriots are the very best​

-By Max Ebb, Contributing Writer

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The Emory Wheel was founded in 1919 and is currently the only independent, student-run newspaper of Emory University. The Wheel publishes weekly on Wednesdays during the academic year, except during University holidays and scheduled publication intermissions.

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